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Like online porn and sexting, hook-up culture seems to be something of a bogeyman set up to take the blame for our collective dissatisfaction with our current relationships. It’s probably the death of monogamy, and not society’s constant messaging that women’s sexual fulfillment is a lower priority than that of their male partners.

Running through all these discussions is the tendency to blame gender imbalances in the sex and dating sphere on superficial symptoms, rather than digging deeper in search of a more fundamental root cause.

The age in which women were urged to keep their legs closed until marriage wasn’t exactly known as a benchmark of female liberation; and let’s not forget the days when women were property to be passed from father to husband.

Casual sex isn't objectively "good" or "bad" for your mental health.

Instead, the way you respond to casual sex largely depends upon your "sociosexual orientation." Those with a restricted sociosexual orientation tend to prefer love, commitment or emotional intimacy before engaging in sex, and those with an unrestricted sociosexual orientation tend to be more comfortable engaging in sex without love, commitment or emotional intimacy.

It’s this conditioning that has us set up to fail no matter what game we’re playing.

So as cuffing season kicks into high gear, take a step back and think about what want, rather than what you’ve been told you’re supposed to want. If casual sex is making you happy, by all means, keep the party rolling.

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