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But when you're sober, spending three hours with a guy who keeps trying to hang his jacket on the hook under the bar is torture.

See, I decided to quit drinking after a 10-year battle with insomnia and sleeping pills.

Though never a huge drinker, I was a steady one — easily downing up to three glasses of red wine per night — and since I'd become hopelessly addicted to Ambien, I was afraid that alcohol might turn problematic, too.

I got why people liked to drink — hell, even I missed nights that began with polite chitchat and ended with us draped over a stranger's car.

Those things never happened in sobriety, and it didn't seem fair.

One night, I was out with a friend in New York City who introduced me to a guy who was a bit boring — but indisputably hot — and as the night wore on, I thought, It's been a long time since I've had sex.

For the first year, I didn't have to answer that question because I didn't date at all in order to get used to my new life: to have fun at a party without a drink in my hand, tear up the dance floor sober, and unwind from a stressful day by meditating instead of pouring a glass. " Another guy friend weighed in, "Without alcohol, you have to work harder to connect on a deeper level.

But eventually, it was time for me to start dating again, so I reactivated my online profile. And if you embarrass yourself, she's going to notice." And another guy put it this way, "It's simple: Alcohol = less inhibited = I have a better chance to score."Regardless, I started meeting dates in cafés instead of bars and making plans that took place at museums and parks.

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